14-Jan-2006

Main Stage, Waukesha, Wisconsin

Third show in three nights for the Clovis Mann-beast; the beast laughs heartily at the road. The smell of gravel, burnt rubber, and bloated roadkill makes us fill with a yearning to trample all the battlements and fortresses of Southeastern Wisconsin. Who was on the list one otherwise innocent January 14th day? Why Waukesha, of course. A red suburb of Milwaukee that didn’t know its final hour was upon it until it was too late. The Main Stage was the eerie battlefield upon which Clovis Mann were crowned victors—but before the maiming and the killing Clovis Mann was hungry so we got heaping bowls of lasagna at Mama Mia’s a block away, which may’ve been the busiest restaurant in all of God’s green earth. The one thing I remember about this place: an otherwise innocuous t-shirt, framed and peculiarly hanging in the bathroom with the message “It ain’t illegal, if you don’t get caught.”

Well, what happened in the bathroom at the Main Stage should’ve been illegal. I went to take a leak and it smelled like freshly cut poop. I nearly gagged, and I have a strong gag reflex. So I held my breath, power peed, and escaped that place. But soon after, that’s when the rumbling started. Since me and Dan had basically been sharing the same eating habits over the last two days, he felt a corresponding rumbling in his tummy too. We flipped a coin and he went to the bathroom first. After he was done, I entered back into the darkness, and wrapped my head with my velour shirt. I could still taste the poo. I nearly gagged a few more times and when I got done, I opened the door, only to be confronted with a short, Mexican man screaming as he used the urinal.

“JESUS CHRIST AMIGO WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU EAT?”

“I wasn’t me man, I was like the third or fourth person in he—”

“HEY MAN, I’M NOT JUDGING, I’D BE PROUD IF I WERE YOU, HOLY SHIT MAN.”

There are some serious music fans in Waukesha, and it was nice to talk to those people. The sound and stage were both excellent as well. One Shot Mickey were real friendly guys and we’ll be back at the Main Stage.

Thanks to all those who came out.